http://blog.gayleleonard.com/2009/06/four-corny-water-jokes/ A blog about funny, humorous and weird items about water, including drinking water, bottled water, water towers, water marketing, recycling, and water themed art and music. Thu, 09 Feb 2012 03:53:58 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 http://blog.gayleleonard.com/2009/06/four-corny-water-jokes/comment-page-1/#comment-27701 WATER FOR THE KING | Kangenwater Wed, 08 Dec 2010 09:51:36 +0000 http://blog.gayleleonard.com/?p=2234#comment-27701 [...] Another funny story by Gayle Leonard [...] [...] Another funny story by Gayle Leonard [...]

]]> http://blog.gayleleonard.com/2009/06/four-corny-water-jokes/comment-page-1/#comment-27700 The Cure | Kangenwater Wed, 08 Dec 2010 09:44:19 +0000 http://blog.gayleleonard.com/?p=2234#comment-27700 [...] by Gayle Leonard [...] [...] by Gayle Leonard [...]

]]> http://blog.gayleleonard.com/2009/06/four-corny-water-jokes/comment-page-1/#comment-22383 Torah Portion Humor – Chukkat (Numbers 19:1 – 22:1) | Torah Portion Humor Weekly Fri, 18 Jun 2010 18:39:47 +0000 http://blog.gayleleonard.com/?p=2234#comment-22383 [...] 1.        If Rabbi begins sermon with “In this week’s parsha” [Torah portion] and you know the parsha ,do a shot of Scotch 2.        If the first commentary quoted is Rashi, drinking a simple revi’is (1/4) of French wine is required 3.        If Rabbi’s tallis is adjusted or falls off while speaking, refill 1 cup of Manischewitz Extra Heavy 4.        If the rabbi opens a book or gives out printouts/sources do a shot of Slivovitz for each source quoted 5.        If the rabbi looses his train of thought, chug beer till he gets back on track 6.        If there is mention of splitting the sea in the sermon, drink a Seabreeze (vodka, grapefruit juice, cranberry juice) 7.        If there is mention of the Jews being in the desert, parch your boredom with a shot of tequila or a Corona 8.        If the speech has to do with any sacrifice/korban or parah adumah (red heifer)  you should drink a Red Bull and Vodka 9.        If any story revolves around a shtetl, mix yourself a White Russian 10.        If the speech quotes a page of talmud & gives the exact daf/page number you must drink that number of shots of vodka 11.        If there is mention of giving the First Fruits hit the Sabra Peach Schnapps 12.        Finish off chugging beer the entire time from when the rabbi finishes until the cantor starts Adon Olam (the final hymn). —————————– http://blog.gayleleonard.com/2009/06/four-corny-water-jokes/ [...] [...] 1.        If Rabbi begins sermon with “In this week’s parsha” [Torah portion] and you know the parsha ,do a shot of Scotch 2.        If the first commentary quoted is Rashi, drinking a simple revi’is (1/4) of French wine is required 3.        If Rabbi’s tallis is adjusted or falls off while speaking, refill 1 cup of Manischewitz Extra Heavy 4.        If the rabbi opens a book or gives out printouts/sources do a shot of Slivovitz for each source quoted 5.        If the rabbi looses his train of thought, chug beer till he gets back on track 6.        If there is mention of splitting the sea in the sermon, drink a Seabreeze (vodka, grapefruit juice, cranberry juice) 7.        If there is mention of the Jews being in the desert, parch your boredom with a shot of tequila or a Corona 8.        If the speech has to do with any sacrifice/korban or parah adumah (red heifer)  you should drink a Red Bull and Vodka 9.        If any story revolves around a shtetl, mix yourself a White Russian 10.        If the speech quotes a page of talmud & gives the exact daf/page number you must drink that number of shots of vodka 11.        If there is mention of giving the First Fruits hit the Sabra Peach Schnapps 12.        Finish off chugging beer the entire time from when the rabbi finishes until the cantor starts Adon Olam (the final hymn). —————————– http://blog.gayleleonard.com/2009/06/four-corny-water-jokes/ [...]

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